♥xneversaneverx♥ (hecate_420) wrote,
♥xneversaneverx♥
hecate_420

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writing after you just woke up isnt a good idea..

its my brothers birthday tomorrow.. that's why i hafta go back to the bay.. im just scared that i wont be able to come back here.. i still wanna see denise and em again before i leave so i hope we all go out tonight. anyways im bringin david with me so we'll have a reason to come back. my brother too. :) he's gonna be 21 and he can buy drinks for us. not that we need him to but yeah..

we went to funworx the other night.. its similar to boomers. an arcade/rides/batting cage/minigolf type of place. they wanted to go on the go-karts.. i just tagged along.. it was fuckin 25 dollars for two people so i said id go watch em. i dint really plan on riding anyway. but karen called me over after like ten minutes and she told me denise bought me an all day pass already. aiya. she wouldnt even let me pay her back.. sound familiar anyone? chinese girl. refuses to let you pay. wont take money no matter what unless you do something desperate like shove it inside her locked mailbox without her knowing?Ü im not used to having a girl pay for me.. i dont feel comfortable with that.. but i dint wanna seem ungrateful so i just said thanks. no way i was gonna win that battle anyway.

we went on the go-karts four times! fuck. it was fun pretending we were all racing and stuff. taking the turns as close to the rail as possible, like Takumi from Initial D. heh. loser. but the novelty was gone after the third time. i dint even wanna go on the fourth one anymore but nise was all begging so i caved. i was just cruising though. took the outside lane and let people pass me.
i wish i had a camera that night.. wanted to take pictures.. nise seemed sweeter than usual. i even made myself believe she got dressed up all cute just for me.. haha kapal. gah i dont wanna go tomorrow...

my tita and tito are actually offering to let me stay with em.. they said it'd make my cousin happy. he's had this sadness in him ever since he moved to the states. same as me i guess. i almost said yes a couple of times. who could ask for a better place for convalescence? at least here im surrounded by friends and it almost feels like home.. davids cool too. we get along real well and he's the only cousin who likes singing like i do. we always sing when were bored. heh. like yesterday we did all the old sunday slowdown songs like cupid, most beautiful girl, crave, 24/7, never no never, god must have spent a little more time on you, all that stuff. senti days in manila. haha. we were outside too and the kids across the street actually stopped playing to listen to us for a while. dyahe. but it was cool..

its 4:40 pm and half the day is gone. i just woke up like an hour ago since we stayed up till 8 this morning. im trying hard not to think about life so much.. i need to be numb to it for a while. i wanna pretend that im one of the kids playing across the street yesterday.. carefree.. life was much simpler then. i wish it had stayed that way. wish i hadnt taken it for granted like i did.. youth is wasted on the young.. or rather, it was wasted on me.
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im trying hard not to think about life so much.. i need to be numb to it for a while. i wanna pretend that im one of the kids playing across the street yesterday.. carefree.. life was much simpler then. i wish it had stayed that way. wish i hadnt taken it for granted like i did.. youth is wasted on the young.. or rather, it was wasted on me.


ditto that!------------------------>> enjoying what this place has to offer in the eyes of other people is one of the worst things that I've ever felt since I got here. I feel the same way too.. I wish I hadn't taken for granted everything..and everyone back home when I had the chance to enjoy their company. All I ever thought was something better was waiting for me here.. I dunno, but I've been disappointed so far.

I'm trying my best to stay afloat and think that my life is in the future. But that's the hardest thing to do.
PUTANGINA. SAKTO SINABI MO SA NAIISIP KO ARAW ARAW MICKEY....
oh? whoa..

pero isang reason kung bakit ganito kasi pera. wala pera. can't afford this and that...and you can't do or go to this and that because we don't want to..or because the drivers are tired..or the mall is too far away.
I can't go out with my friends.. or with the few persons I've made friends since the half-year that I've been here.

ewan..siguro mas matatanggap ko na pag at least may konting freedom ako dito..o pera! haha i wish i could have a job ..at least hnde ako hingi nang hingi sa parents ko na trato sa akin 10 year old. seryoso yun. at sobra nakakainis!
hmmm... interesting..
damn hella gay balter. you got an lj too! haha :p